In Pakistan, Virtual Private Networks (VPNs) have found themselves at the crossroads of faith and functionality. Allama Raghib Naeemi, the chief of the Council of Islamic Ideology (CII), recently declared VPNs un-Islamic—but with conditions. His argument? If VPNs are used for “blasphemy, character assassination, or threats to national security,” they violate Islamic principles. However, if you’re using them for education or positive communication, you’re in the clear. So, is this a fatwa with exceptions or just another moral firewall?

Naeemi clarified his stance after facing criticism for his original decree, drawing a curious comparison: VPNs, like loudspeakers, are neutral tools until misused. Much like the Punjab Sound Systems Act, which criminalizes loudspeakers used for spreading hate speech, VPNs are judged by their intent. Accessing banned platforms like X (formerly Twitter) or, ahem, other sites? That’s a no-go. Logging into your university portal abroad? Carry on.

But the debate doesn’t end there. Pakistan’s Interior Ministry has flagged VPNs as tools for terrorists, citing their misuse for financial transactions and violent plots. Meanwhile, the Pakistan Telecommunication Authority reports that millions of “immoral” websites are accessed daily using VPNs. Amid the uproar, the average Pakistani seems more interested in bypassing blocks on social media rather than plotting nefarious schemes.

The bigger picture is a paradox of censorship and connectivity. While some call for tighter controls, others wonder if this moral policing extends to the digital world. One thing’s for sure: Pakistan’s internet, much like its politics, is anything but boring.